The first time I saw and heard the phrase "Live Together, Die Alone" was when I was watching the much talked about T.V show "Lost". I was left amazed by the similarity between the situation of the characters of "Lost" and that in Ann Arbor that I have been observing since my first semester.
In "Lost", the characters are stranded on an island after an aeroplane accident. The island is apparently untraceable to the various search parties due to some xyz characteristics of the island itself (they say it moves in time and space...huh!?) The characters come from different countries and hence different social backgrounds. They are actually strangers to each other. Over a period of time they learn to live together in "harmony". In times of hardships and also in some seemingly fatal accidents they can be seen to help each other out. However, what is interesting about "dying alone" is that in life threatening situations, each person will try and save his or her life and then think about any other person to save. Well, given that the people are strangers to each other this behavior is quite natural. The point is that the level of attachment is very very low for an individual to be able to think first about any one else may it even be any non-life-threatening situation.
Now then what is so peculiar about our life as graduate students living together that I have seen here in Ann Arbor and which I find similar to that of the characters of "Lost"? I have seen students helping each other in difficult times. That help may be of any kind like volunteering for airport rides, exchanging study notes, completing academic formalities for each other, lending to others one's identity card ( it is called a M-Card here) and many more. Now I can't give examples of "life-threatening" situations in Ann Arbor. But surely I can say that the level of attachment is very low amongst many students if not all. Further, I would argue that even that low level of attachment is superficial. You can test your level of attachment (if you disagree) by thinking how much really you would miss being with someone if he or she were not around compared to missing the people in your life you are very much attached to.
I am not lamenting on what I observe. Just that I wanted to describe our lives here in one phrase and I found one after some time. What needs to be highlighted is the level of professionalism that has crept in following the completion of our Bachelor's studies. A simple example that comes to the mind is the following. Two friends in one course. The homework is due in 5 minutes. One has all the work completed, the other lags behind by as much as 5 hours. Both know that getting extra time from the course instructor is possible. Ask yourself, if you were the student with the completed homework would you wait for your colleague and turn in your work along with him, say 4-5 hours late. Chances are that if this situation happens during your undergraduate studies you would wait. Post graduation, you won't. In your mind as a Master's student you will only think about your performance being affected in the eyes of the instructor if you are late. (Although sometimes even as an undergraduate student you shall think on similar lines) Not that your colleague would want you to submit your work late with him or her. He or she also knows the importance of being a good student at the Master's level and shall understand your decision of not waiting.
Live together, die alone in the literal sense is okay for a T.V show like "Lost". It has to be understood at a different level in our case. So then the human feeling kind of "linked to professionalism" like jealousy, does it also manifest itself in our lives here? Ohhhhhh....I am not opening that can of worms for sure!
--- Thanks to Vaibhav Jaguste for "proof reading" my first post. ---
In "Lost", the characters are stranded on an island after an aeroplane accident. The island is apparently untraceable to the various search parties due to some xyz characteristics of the island itself (they say it moves in time and space...huh!?) The characters come from different countries and hence different social backgrounds. They are actually strangers to each other. Over a period of time they learn to live together in "harmony". In times of hardships and also in some seemingly fatal accidents they can be seen to help each other out. However, what is interesting about "dying alone" is that in life threatening situations, each person will try and save his or her life and then think about any other person to save. Well, given that the people are strangers to each other this behavior is quite natural. The point is that the level of attachment is very very low for an individual to be able to think first about any one else may it even be any non-life-threatening situation.
Now then what is so peculiar about our life as graduate students living together that I have seen here in Ann Arbor and which I find similar to that of the characters of "Lost"? I have seen students helping each other in difficult times. That help may be of any kind like volunteering for airport rides, exchanging study notes, completing academic formalities for each other, lending to others one's identity card ( it is called a M-Card here) and many more. Now I can't give examples of "life-threatening" situations in Ann Arbor. But surely I can say that the level of attachment is very low amongst many students if not all. Further, I would argue that even that low level of attachment is superficial. You can test your level of attachment (if you disagree) by thinking how much really you would miss being with someone if he or she were not around compared to missing the people in your life you are very much attached to.
I am not lamenting on what I observe. Just that I wanted to describe our lives here in one phrase and I found one after some time. What needs to be highlighted is the level of professionalism that has crept in following the completion of our Bachelor's studies. A simple example that comes to the mind is the following. Two friends in one course. The homework is due in 5 minutes. One has all the work completed, the other lags behind by as much as 5 hours. Both know that getting extra time from the course instructor is possible. Ask yourself, if you were the student with the completed homework would you wait for your colleague and turn in your work along with him, say 4-5 hours late. Chances are that if this situation happens during your undergraduate studies you would wait. Post graduation, you won't. In your mind as a Master's student you will only think about your performance being affected in the eyes of the instructor if you are late. (Although sometimes even as an undergraduate student you shall think on similar lines) Not that your colleague would want you to submit your work late with him or her. He or she also knows the importance of being a good student at the Master's level and shall understand your decision of not waiting.
Live together, die alone in the literal sense is okay for a T.V show like "Lost". It has to be understood at a different level in our case. So then the human feeling kind of "linked to professionalism" like jealousy, does it also manifest itself in our lives here? Ohhhhhh....I am not opening that can of worms for sure!
--- Thanks to Vaibhav Jaguste for "proof reading" my first post. ---
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ReplyDeleteBut well, to make a comment, part of it is in fact true and I myself have experienced it. There are some people trying to 'socialize' with you rather than just be friends. So if you are dealing with people like these more frequently encountered in grad school, it might confuse you and conflict with your belief system and the expectations you may have from them.
On another note, who have been friends have been friends for sure. It is just that the time spent with people in grad life is limited. If you compare grad life with undergrad, here everybody is so busy that they may not be as big a part of your life as friends from your undergrad may have. In undergrad, you spend almost all the time with friends. You are with the same people in the same class, do the same work together, study together and rest of the time-pass is another story. Part of it may also be professionalism. I never gave a shit about my grades in undergrad unless it was a crucial matter. (You know what I mean :P). Now when I pay tones of money for my tuition, there is a reason I’ll think twice before I say ‘chalta hai’. Part of it may also be the social mindset that we sort of unconsciously emulated from the Americans. But I did have good times. The times we travelled together, the times we hung out at places, the times we had night outs, the times we cooked together, the times we had our jamming sessions, are all the memories which will always be cherished. And as a matter of fact we at 13B8 were much better off than most of the people I know elsewhere around. (But beware of GPT Syndrome here!)
In short, you can’t make an apple-orange comparison. We didn’t change much, it was just the circumstances that did. Move out of Ann Arbor and tell me if you don’t miss the place and people around there.